


Not All Grave Mistakes Have Terrible Outcomes

by PriorityNaps



Series: SNIPPETS [2]
Category: Gintama
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Fluff, M/M, Romance, Roommates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-09
Updated: 2019-07-09
Packaged: 2020-06-25 12:45:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19746034
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PriorityNaps/pseuds/PriorityNaps
Summary: Hijikata should've thought twice before making Gintoki do the laundry.





	Not All Grave Mistakes Have Terrible Outcomes

**Author's Note:**

> This series is NOT inspired by or copying any other existing works/series. I've had this idea for a while now and only just started acting on it out of sheer laziness.

Gintoki drags his feet out the elevator once the _ding_ up above announces its arrival on the sixth floor. His room is the third one from the hallway’s end and he feels too exhausted to head over there anytime soon. The only thing keeping him going is the prospect of him tossing his shoulder bag out the window once he gets inside and curling up on his bed with a JUMP and maybe a little snack. His classes are done for the day, too, so he’s free for the remainder of the afternoon and evening. 

Almost there. Gintoki could already feel the softness of his pillow against his back, the crisp papers of the JUMP being caressed by his fingers, the way that chocolate-chip cookie he’d shoved in his desk before leaving that morning would melt in his mouth after he sinks his teeth in it―

Someone shoulders past him and that’s when he realizes he’s passed the door to his room. He throws an inconspicuous glance over his shoulder to make sure no one had seen him daydreaming (other than the guy who’d just walked by) and quickly backpedals. He rummages through his shoulder bag for the keys, cursing himself for not having taken them out in the elevator instead of counting the spots on some kid’s shirt back there. He bangs a fist on the door when he doesn’t find them in the seven minutes that follow and prays to the ones up above that his roommate’s in there, preferably _not_ in the bathroom or with headphones on. 

A few seconds pass before the door opens to reveal a wet-haired Hijikata in shorts and a black T-shirt. Gintoki’s immediately relieved. 

“Hey.”

Hijikata nods wordlessly in greeting and steps aside to let Gintoki in. Once he shuts the door he gets grabbed at the hips and is gently pushed back until he connects with the wall behind him. He knows what’s coming next, so his arms automatically go around Gintoki’s shoulders to pull him in. It’s more of a long-time-no-see kiss since Hijikata had to leave earlier for classes and didn’t have it in him that morning to smack the perm head awake to say good-bye. 

“How was class?” he asks after they part.

Gintoki shrugs.

“Wasn’t really paying attention.”

He gives Hijikata’s hips a playful squeeze then drops his bag by the door and heads over to his bed. It’s been made, courtesy of so his roommate, he doesn’t have to worry about smoothing out the sheets or fluffing up his pillow. He doesn’t bother with removing his shoes, just twists his body and hops backward so his ass lands square on the mattress, and props his pillow up and leans against it. He lets his eyelids flutter shut, not minding the lights being on.

He’s completely taken by surprise when he feels something yank at his foot and his whole body gets jerked forward.

“Gah! What the f―!”

“Don’t even _think_ about me letting you wear shoes in bed, dipshit.”

Gintoki pouts moodily but lets Hiijkata pull off his other shoe and place both neatly by the doorway next to his forgotten shoulder bag. 

“Can you change my socks too, Toshi?” Gintoki wiggles his toes and pulls one of his pleading faces, but Hijikata wrinkles his nose.

“ _Ew_ , no! Go get your own from the closet, no way in hell am I digging through your stuff _or_ going anywhere near your bare feet.”

“But I’m _tired_! I had such a long day listening to all those monotone professors! Can’t they do _something_ to make their classes interesting?”

Hijikata crosses his arms. 

“I thought you weren’t paying attention to their lectures.”

Gintoki opens his mouth, then closes it.

“I knew you were just being lazy. Get your ass up, c’mon.”

With a much-exaggerated groan, Gintoki rolls off the bed and nearly bangs his head on the night-stand beside it. He walks over to the closet and pulls the bifold doors open. He dodges the pair of jeans that come tumbling out from the top shelf, sits his ass down, and begins sifting through his clothing for a pair of socks. Unlike Hijikata, he never found reason in organizing his apparel, so it all just sits in one huge pile on the floor or gets crammed onto the few shelves installed.

He pulls out a white sock with donuts printed on it but doesn’t see its twin. So he sets it to the side and keeps searching. He gives up after about nine seconds and slumps his shoulders, hands landing on his thighs with an audible _slap_. 

Where the fuck did all his socks go?

“Hey, where did all my socks go?”

He feels Hijikata walk over to and kneel behind him.

“Dunno.” 

They both eyeball Gintoki’s side of the closet.

“Wait,” Hijikata says after a beat.

“Hm?”

“You did the laundry last night, didn’t you?”

“...”

No, he didn’t.

“...You didn’t.”

Gintoki breaks eye contact and shakes his head sheepishly. 

Hijikata puts a hand on his knee and pinches the bridge of his nose.

“Why am I not surprised. Go do it now, will ya?” He says. Then, more to himself than Gintoki, “Can’t believe I didn’t notice earlier.”

Gintoki jerks his head back to face his roommate, panic rushing through him.

“B-But _Toshi_ ―!”

“Uh-uh.”

“Pleeeease?”

“Nope.”

“I’m gonna cry.”

“Go ahead.”

“I’m gonna do it!”

“I’m waiting.”

They lock eyes in an attempt to stare each other down, which is something Gintoki isn't very good at when it comes to his roommate. Not two seconds pass when his left eye starts stinging and he feels it start to well up a little (see, he’s crying!). He starts inching his hand toward Hijikata to poke him in the eye or to snap his fingers in front of his face but stops when he feels something chapped yet soft press itself on his cheek. 

He blinks when Hijikata pulls away, then starts spluttering in a mixture of annoyance and embarrassment.

“CH-CHEATER!!!”

“SAYS YOU! Don’t think I didn’t see your hand creeping toward me!”

“That was for a totally different reason, Mr. Jumps-to-Conclusions!”

“ _Oh yeah_? Let’s hear it, then!”

Gintoki’s mind scrambles for something.

“There was… a spider?”

Silence.

“That woulda sounded convincing if you hadn’t said it like a question.”

Right.

“Hn.”

...This is getting awkward. Gintoki had better do something before Hijikata remembers the dirty laundry hampers by the bathroom door.

“Don’t think I forgot the dirty laundry hampers by the bathroom door.”

Damn.

-x-X-x-X-x-

He nearly knocks the door off its hinges when he kicks it open to the laundry room. The stupid hampers were nearly full and he had to dump his into Hijikata’s since he couldn’t lug both of them at the same time and wasn’t in the mood to make two trips. He has to carry it with both hands instead of tucking it under his arm because it’s kind of heavy. No one is in the room, though, so he’s at least happy it’s all to himself. 

Gintoki is a lot pickier than he lets on. There are six pairs of washers and dryers in total, all lined up against the wall, each of the same brand and installed at roughly the same time. He’s only okay with using the third pair, for several reasons including its relatively new look and lack of dents or scratches (he doesn’t know what goes on in the laundry room, nor does he want to) compared to the others.

When he marches up to his preferred dryer he’s relieved to see it empty. He’s quick to dump the hamper’s contents in the washer, toss in the detergent and whatever, and turn it on. He dusts his hands, gives himself a pat on the back, and heads out. 

He doesn’t realize what he’s done until much later that evening when he hauls the clean clothing back to his and Hijikata’s room. 

-X-

“That was fast,” is the first thing that’s said to him when he walks in roughly two hours later. “Don’t you usually take twice as long?”

Gintoki pulls a face.

“Rude! Be grateful I willingly agreed to do the laundry, brat!”

Hijikata jumps up from the chair he’s sitting on and yells, “ _Willingly_?! I had to kick your ass out the door! Literally! And who are you calling brat, huh?!”

“You, obviously," Gintoki pretends to scan the room like he's searching for something. "I don’t see any other brat.”

He sets the hamper full of their newly-washed clothes on his own bed. He can feel the heat of Hijikata’s glare at the back of his neck. He turns his head to grin at him.

“What is it, Toshi? No comeback?”

Hijikata’s got his hands balled into fists and he’s nearly trembling with rage.

“You…” 

Gintoki’s eyebrow quirks. Is something up?

“I what?”

Hijikata closes his eyes, takes a few deep breaths, and flexes his fingers at his sides.

“You did our laundry separately, right?”

Oh shit.

_OH SHIT!_

Gintoki chuckles feebly and rubs a hand behind his neck.

“You… didn’t.”

“N-No?”

He’s looking everywhere but at Hijikata even though he knows it’s not a good idea. He also knows there are a pair of eyes on him, practically boring holes into the crown of his head.

“We can sort out the clothes, though, right?”

“What other choice is there? Get to work.”

Gintoki’s about to happily oblige but stops short.

“Whoa, hey! You’re saying I have to do this _alone_?!”

Hijikata doesn’t answer. His back is turned.

“Asshole! We can get it done quicker with the two of us!”

Still no answer.

“Oi! Don’t ignore me, you―”

He seizes Hijikata by the shoulder and whirls him around to find a blush blooming over his typically pale features.

“Wha―why are you blushing?”

Hijikata glares and turns away, but Gintoki tightens his grip to keep him in place.

That’s when it hits him. Gintoki sighs and tries not to line-face.

“You don’t wanna sort our underwear out. Is that it?”

No answer.

“Thought so. C’mon, what’s there to be shy about? We’ve known each other for years.”

Hijikata decides to respond with a jerk to free his shoulder and a smack to Gintoki’s head. He stalks away, probably to lock himself in the bathroom, the loser.

“Fuckin’ prick! Fuck you!”

Fuck him? 

_Fuck him?!_

“Why don’t you come over here and fuck me yourself, you coward?!”

Instead of turning into a blushing, spluttering mess, Hijikata spins around and yells, “I already did last night, dumbass!”

Gintoki’s got a snide remark ready but is surprised at Hijikata’s sudden forwardness. He tries recalling last night’s events and realizes Hijikata is right. 

So the ache in his hips wasn't from all that walking? Huh.

“Enough about last night. Let’s get working.”

He turns the hamper upside down so its contents land in a heap on the carpet then plops down in front of it. He looks up expectantly at Hijikata and pats the space next to him. 

Hijikata reluctantly walks over, but instead of next to Gintoki, he sits across from him.

They work in silence. It’s a tedious job since they usually shared their clothes and couldn’t remember whose was whose. Gintoki notices Hijikata stayed away from the underwear, tossing them back in the pile when he accidentally plucked one out. He scoffs to himself and keeps digging for a white sock with donuts printed on it. Hopefully, he won’t get caught not doing what he’s supposed to do.

Hijikata is neatly folding T-shirts and pants and pairing up socks that match. He knows very well that all of Gintoki’s clothes would just get crumpled up or rolled into a ball and tossed in the closet but folds his too, anyway. He tries not to look at the graphic shirts owned by Gintoki. Almost all of them are ones he’d stolen from his other three friends, and all had very peculiar fashion senses in his opinion. 

“Hey, this yours?”

Hijikata looks up to see a pair of green boxers dangling too close to his face for his liking. He grabs Gintoki by the wrist and pushes them away from his face.

“Well, if you don’t recognize it as your own then of course it’s mine,” he mumbles.

“Hm. Juuuuust makin’ sure. You never know. It might be Tatsuma’s for all I know.”

Hijikata’s eye bulge.

“Why the _fuck_ would his boxers be here?!” Then, getting on his knees and wildly sifting through the laundry, “Are there other people’s stuff in here, too?!”

Gintoki rubs at his nose. “Maybe.”

Hijikata sits back on his folded legs and tucks a stray lock of hair behind his ear. He’d tied his hair up when he’d deemed it dry enough, but the ponytail was starting to get loose.

“You― God, I don’t know if I wanna yell till your eardrums pop or beat you senseless.”

Gintoki inserts his finger in his nose. “You could try both. Keyword: _try_.”

“Don’t you fucking _think_ about belittling me, ya prick. I’ll knock you out in no time.”

Gintoki takes his finger out of his nose and examines it. “Uh-huh.”

Hijikata clenches his hands into fists.

“ _Grrr_ , you piss me off!” he yells, lunging for Gintoki over the pile of clothes between them. He's completely taken aback when Gintoki easily rolls out the way. A wave of indignance sweeps over him when he sees the complete nonchalance displayed on the perm head's face.

Gintoki jumps on top of Hijikata’s sprawled-out form, knees squeezing at his waist, and throws his hands up in victory. His roommate yelps in surprise at the sudden dead weight on his back.

“The Almighty Gin-san has won again!”

Beneath him, Hijikata’s trying to worm his way out but failing. 

“Almighty? Don't eulogize yourself, bastard, all you did was roll like an idiot!”

Gintoki lowers his arms to his hips and huffs comically.

“And look where that found you.”

Hijikata grows silent, stopping his random flailing. 

“What is it, Toshi? No comeback?” Gintoki reiterates his words from earlier, a smug grin stretching over his face.

“No, you’re just too fucking heavy. Get off.”

The grin is wiped clean off his face, and he theatrically clutches a hand over his heart and gasps. “Meanie!” He grabs Hijikata’s ponytail and yanks hard, earning a yowl from his roommate.

“Not the hair, dammit! Don’t touch it with your grubby underwear fingers when I just washed it!”

_Grubby underwear fingers?_

Gintoki slaps a hand over his mouth to stifle a laugh.

“Oi, are you laughing? Don’t you dare laugh!” Hijikata starts up his twisting and turning again.

“Oh come on, Toshi! Have some fun, already!”

Gintoki scoots back a little and stabs at Hijikata’s sides, then begins to full-on tickle him. He knows for a fact he’s ticklish at the waist, so he keeps it up until Hijikata flails more than ever and starts shrieking at him to cut it out between his barking laughter. 

When the last of the giggles leaves him, Gintoki moves off Hijikata, but his roommate stays lying there, trying to catch his breath.

“Damn you...” Hijikata manages between pants. Gintoki sits down beside his head and pokes his cheek.

“That’s what you get for making me do the laundry!”

**Author's Note:**

> Y'know. 
> 
> Once I left a black marker in my hoodie when I tossed it in the laundry. Nothing happened to the washer but the dryer had some nice streaks of black all over it. 
> 
> They're still there, since that marker happened to be permanent. Also cuz I didn't feel like cleaning it up.
> 
> Anyway. I wasn't all that satisfied about posting this, but uh...


End file.
